Crashjokes: Kids

• I was in the hair color aisle of K-Mart, debating whether I should touch up my dark roots. Down the aisle comes a man and a little boy; the boy looks at the man and goes, "Daddy? Why is that lady's hair two different colors?"
  Needless to say, I bought a box.
  
• Sometimes when I'm shopping, I leave my sunglasses on. I was at the checkout of Glen's when a boy in front of me shined a keychain flashlight in my face. When his mother told him to stop, he said, "Why Mom? She's already blind."
  
• Another time while shopping with sunglasses on, a kid in a nearby cart pointed at me and yelled. "Look, Mom! It's Aunt Patty! She got fat!"
  
• Every now and then at the store, some little kid follows me around. When I stop and ask if the child is lost, the run away yelling "You're not my mommy!"
  One time, it was, "You're not my daddy!"
  
• Back in high school and college, I had very short hair. One time at Kmart, a little boy kept staring at me in the pet food aisle. He then pointed at me, looked at his mother and squawked, "Mommy! That man is wearing makeup!"
  
• I used to work as a busser back in high school; back then I had short hair and I had to clean the bathrooms. More than once, a little kid would look at me and go, "Mom! There's a guy in the girl's bathroom!"
  
• When I shop for strawberries, I look underneath the carton to check for rotten ones or mold. One time as I was doing this, a little girl sat in the cart next to mine.
  "What are you doing?" She asked.
  "I'm checking the strawberries."
  "Oh...are they boys or girls?"
  
• I work as a hotel housekeeper; one room had little kids in it. One day the kids came out while I was working; one looked at her mother and yelled, "Mom! Is that the towel fairy?"
  
• Sometimes at the hotel, kids would bring stuffed animals with them. When we housekeepers make the beds, we put the animals in goofy poses as a joke. More than once, the kids would go, "Hey! Our animals came to life and we missed it!"
  
• At our old post office, posters of at-large criminals were on the walls. Once while I stuffed envelopes, a kid pointed at one poster and yelled, "Look, Mom, it's Daddy!"
  
• I carry a handcart to haul my groceries. One time as I was packing said handcart, a little girl pointed at me and squeaked, "Look, Mommy! A homeless lady!"
  Mom's reply? "Now, dear, it's not polite to point!"
  
• I have a Himalayan cat face tattooed on my arm. More than once, some kid would point to it and ask, "Why is there a raccoon on your arm?"